I would believe in the craziest of things. The most farfetched, the never-going-to-happen's. I have this energy - this hope - that seems to most of the time make everything seem better. It's my own filter. It makes the distasteful palatable. It makes the never-going-to-happen's seem plausible. I like to see the world with rose-coloured glasses on. I cannot say it is a foolproof method of defence. There are times when I feel that all is hopeless - but here I am. Thinking of you. Thinking I may stand out to you one day. Thinking that it's a viable option. That the statistics are against us - but it could happen. Well yes - it could. Maybe I'll find out you're a terrible, soul-crushing person. I'll re-read this blog post, and think I am the biggest idiot, for ever wasting any thought process on you. Or maybe you're so amazing. I hope it is this (of course). I want to know, even if it turns out that I think I'm an idiot for making you so important when you don't know me at all. You're a book I've only read the front cover of. I tried to decipher the blurb, but it was a bit hard to understand. Nevertheless, there are an endless amount of pages to discover. Our stories don't end. I think if I were able to read the first chapter, or even the first page, I might get a clearer glimpse of you.Though I suspect it will not be in chronological order, which will either be a help or a hindrance. I'm afraid. I'm afraid I'll be too scared of you to even attempt to open the book. I'll gaze shyly at my shoes - hoping you pick up on the nuances. But we're all to busy to pick up on nuances right?
I will be more confident. I have realised that only that is the key.
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